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What's been going on with me?

2.6.14
hosp

Hey remember me? Well I don't really know how to start this post and I've been meaning to sit down and write it for a while now, if you follow me on Twitter/Instagram then you may already be aware of what has been going on in my life lately if not then here it is! 



In my last post I was sat in sunny Dubai starting the beginning of my two week holiday. From that blog post onwards things just went downhill for me and my whole trip turned out to be more of a nightmare than the dreamy break I had hoped for. I was severely bitten by what seemed to be insect/mosquitos, now I usually always get bitten and I deal with it but this was like nothing I had experienced before. The bites progressed from my arms, all over my body, my back, my neck, my face and it just got worse and worse. I was in so much pain and my whole body begun to swell, day after day my conditioned worsened to the point where I had to go to the hospital. I was injected numerous times to try and calm down the skin irritation, I was in so much pain and discomfort and didn't really know what was going on. I spent a later four days in and out of hospitals seeing doctors and specialists trying to determine the problem but there seemed to be no simple explanation. I was put on strong medication, antibiotics and steroids - I wasn't sleeping, I wasn't eating, I was majorly distressed. On the day I was meant to fly back home I was on such high dosage of medication that I begun hallucinating and I started having panic attacks, it was one of the scariest moments of my life (without sounding overly dramatic!) I couldn't breathe but luckily my friend Vidal was about because he managed to calm me down. As a result of my difficulty with breathing I was unable to fly home. When I eventually did get home (Last Monday now!) my luggage got lost which caused me to have another panic attack which again didn't help the situation. I got back to London and went to A&E again no one was able to give me any answers and my skin was continuing to flare up and move the bites were moving around my body. By this point I was convinced that there was something that had poisoned my blood - So I had the tests etc. Since last week I have been consistently taking my medication, covering my skin in steroid cream and sleeping at almost every occasion. I am so unbelievably exhausted which is something I am not used to, even writing this post I'm fighting against my heavy eyelids. As a result of the medication, I am feeling pretty crap - My body is scarred all over with these mysterious marks which now look like a series of bruises, my hair is falling out, I'm constantly crying and generally couldn't feel further from myself. 

The reason I wanted to write this post is to let you guys know what's been going on, I had a lot of pre written posts ready to go up prior to Dubai and I will slowly be getting them out to you guys, but over the next few weeks I am going to be a little quieter on the Blogging/YouTube front - at least until my energy levels get back to normal. I wanted to also thank many of you for your messages through social media, I'm not well right now but I'm seeing slow progress on a daily basis. I still have no idea what caused this reaction which then seem to have a spiralling affect on my health and I am awaiting results of various blood tests, so hopefully this week will come with some answers. 

I have so many blog posts and videos waiting to be edited and uploaded I almost feel a sense of guilt for not being able to deliver but right now my health is priority. I hope you guys can understand, I miss the interaction with you guys but I'm hoping in the next few weeks things will get better, I am just trying to take each day as it comes. 

Again, THANK YOU for all your constant support. 

So much love.. 

Zara
x

45 comments

  1. Oh gosh, poor you. I once took high dose steroids and started having major anxiety and panic attack - it's a documented side effect. The worst thing is you don't realise at the time and it's only afterwards when you put 2 and 2 together it all makes sense!

    Lots of love to you. Xx

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  2. You take as much time as you need, dear. Get better! <3

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  3. Oh my god honey you sound like a case of mystery diagnosis. I can read the despair in your words and I hope you soon find some comfort and get the answers you need! All the best gorgeous and I'm looking forward to an update saying you're 100% back to normal! All the best.

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  4. Feel better Zara :( hope everything's alright xx

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  5. Feel much better Zara! Lots of love and well wishes from Canada

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  6. Hope you get better Zara, sending lots of love your way xo

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  7. I hope you feel better soon, try to stay calm and hopefully things will get back to normal. Lots of love

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  8. take your time and get well!!

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  9. Wishing you a speedy recovery. I am in no way a doctor, but it sounds like the same symptoms another vlogger/blogger had while in Indonesia. She was also exhausted and experienced hair-loss. Turns out she had Dengue Fever.

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  10. Oh my gosh, Zara! I am so sorry to hear that you've been so unwell, I really hope you find out what it is soon and I wish you a speedy recovery :(

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  11. Zara this sounds awful-I hope you get better soon...lots of internet love! Xxx

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  12. Oh dear this sounds really horrible! I hope you are better than what it started as.. and wish you a speedy recovery with all my heart!

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  13. Sounds terrible :( I hope you get well soon...

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  14. Oh Zara, sorry to hear you've been so ill. Fingers crossed you get some answers soon and that it's nothing too serious! Hope you have plenty of Harvey Specter around to keep you company!

    Kavya xx

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  15. I have heard about this virus outbreak in Middle East which has caused great unrest in that region but not exactly sure what it is. People are facing similar symptoms as you have mentioned in your post.
    I will pray for you I wish you all the health & I hope you get better soon.

    http://www.zarapervaiz-dar.com/

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  16. Sorry to hear this happened to you :( I hope you'll get answers soon of what caused all this and that you'll feel better soon.

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  17. thought you just want to show us your miu miu bag!

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  18. Get well soon. Take your time. Your life is too precious.

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  19. Sounds scary, hope you get better soon lovely! X

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  20. Wishing you a speedy recovery xoxo

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  21. poor you! that sounds awful!! maybe you should go and visit the hospital for tropical diseases which is in central london (paddington i think!) . they may be able to help and find out what happened..
    wishing you a speedy recovery!

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  22. Get better soon! This sounds truly awful :( x
    http://mividabonitaa.blogspot.nl/

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  23. Really hope you get better soon xx

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  24. Get well soon Zara..we miss you!xxx

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  25. I hope you get some answers soon Zara. Wishing you a speedy recovery x

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  26. you poor thing Oh my goodness I pray you get well quick really missed ya post. mwahz xx

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  27. Please get well soon! It sucks that things like this happen. I hope for a speedy recovery. God Bless!

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  28. Hope you get well soon Zara. InshAllaah.. & May this be a purification for you ameen xxx

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  29. How awful. I hope you feel better soon!

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  30. Oh my gosh Z! I can't even begin to imagine the pain you must be in but it sounds absolutely terrifying. I wonder what could it possibly be? I hope they find what is wrong so you can get the proper treatment and care. Be well my dear!

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  31. oh hun..that sounds truly horrible!! sending positive thoughts your way! take all the time you need!! xxx

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  32. oh hun that sound truly horrible! sending positive thoughts your way! take all the time you need! xxx

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  34. Hey Zara, my heart goes out to you. I'm just glad that you had great amazing friends that were with you to get through this while you were in Dubai and continued family/friends support when you got back home. Listen, it's ok to cry and just let it all out but don't let this thing get the best of you. One of my favorite quotes is: "No matter what comes your way, shake it off and move forward. When you have a positive mindset, you can't be defeated." I know it's easier said than done but you will get through this. Hope you're feeling alot better these days and having more happy days than sad ones.

    Thank you for being so open/honest and having enough energy to share such a private scary thing that happened to you. Hope you finally know what caused the flare ups/reactions....get well soon and wishing you a speedy recovery.

    Sending lots of hugs and support from NYC.

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  35. Hi Zara, I’ve never manifested on your blog before but still I’m a loyal reader to your blog and love it!
    I feel so sorry to read your story… and I sincerely wish you a speed recovery.
    I’m really concerned by the symptoms you described and it look so much like a tropical disease we commonly know here under the tropics… (I live in the West Indies) The disease is also transmitted buy mosquitoes…And the effects are the same.
    If you feel like you don’t recover as well as you would maybe you could check these two diseases with your doctor? :
    - Chikungunya
    - Dengue fever
    You can find this two diseases transmitted by mosquitoes all around the world under tropical climate (maybe like Dubai...).
    I wish you all the best & the strength to recover well. Be brave & don’t give up! xxx
    Ps: Please excuse my english… I’m French! :)

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  36. Of course we understand, Zara. I hope you get better soon. Such a terrible ordeal you've been through, I can't imagine what it's been like. Sending you lots of love xxxxxxxxxx

    bittersweet-bhavna.blogspot.co.uk

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  37. Oh wow! Get well soon

    BLEURGH - www.say-bleurgh.blogspot.com

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  38. Oh God I hope you feel a bit better now, and that you had answers about your condition. Be strong xxx

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  39. Oh God I hope you feel a bit better now and you had answers about your condition. I wish you get better soon xxx

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  40. Oh Zara, this is horrible, I would have the exact same feelings that you have described. I have had a strange dermatitis that I haven't been able to figure out or treat for the last few months but nothing in the realm of what you are experiencing. I hope that two weeks on from this post the inflammatory reaction whatever it is has subsided. I have been a long time fan of your blog and youtube channel, just re-watched your 2014, positivity video and your videos always make me feel better
    , sending a rainbow of positivity your way xxx Nadia

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  41. I alway get bitten by those pesky mosquitoes too! This year I've been trying to avoid them at all costs due to the diseases they are carrying. I really hope you feel better Zara and I'm sorry you've been having such a lousy time!

    Jen xx
    jentea.blogspot.com

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  42. Zara I am really sorry to hear that dear :( Hope you will get better soon!

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  43. Sounds like chikungunya. Hope you are feeling better.

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  44. Zara...girl..don't worry about post or videos...just get well...no guilt...this is your life/health we are talking about...that is priority! Wishing that you will be WELL soon!!!! (((hugs)))...

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  45. Hope the doctors find out what's ailing you, and that you get better soon!

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Thanks for stopping by! I read all your comments and try to reply to them. If you would like more of a direct reply feel free to email me at.. Mouldyfruit@gmail.com xxx

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